You’ll find women do that when they lose control…” I felt flattered.“You know what fuck means don’t you?” I had a vague idea.“It’s something to do with sex isn’t it?” I hazarded a guess. Auntie Eleanor grinned and nodded her head.“When I was telling me the facts of life I called it making love but a lot of people call it a fucking.” I nodded as if I had this sort of conversation all the time.“Fucking?” I must admit it felt good to say it. Auntie Eleanor grinned.“So would you like to fuck me now then?” My heart leapt into my mouth. This was it! I was actually going to do it with a woman and lose my virginity!“Yes please Auntie Eleanor!” “Well get your jeans off then!” Auntie Eleanor instructed and I quickly unbuttoned my jeans and pulled them down. I took my socks off and then slid down my briefs so my cock, which was of course a fully erect by now, bobbed into view.“Jesus he’s even bigger than I remember!” I gazed down as it bobbed about in front of me. Auntie Eleanor. I made up those rings myself, and removed the castings manufacturer’s hallmark. I do a nice job, and you don’t often see claw-work that good on cubic zirconia. If you ever buy jewellery retail, you probably don’t want to know how little they cost. It’s funny that I never thought of using them the way randy jewellers traditionally do. We all have our standards, I suppose. As for what I planned, the prisons would be overflowing if that was a crime. The next stop was Dumfries, and the loft where the local newspaper keep a century and a half of back issues. I’d consulted those before, and nobody knew I wasn’t looking for local history this time. I spent two evenings there, compiling a list of girls under twenty who had been convicted of minor offences in the last year. The age was not my preference, specially, but to increase the chances of their being single and childless. I excluded anything suggesting drugs, alcoholism, a man, motherhood or irrational aggression, and I checked the old.
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